Showing posts with label Thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Thoughts. Show all posts

Friday, August 12, 2011

Thoughts from my bed...sad day for the smith family.

Yesterday was supposed to be a fun exciting day....my in laws were set to arrive from Oregon so Chad and I could leave town for a couple of nights ....with out the kids....to celebrate his big 4...0....about an hour before they arrived our little dog Chuy Pepe was hit by a car and killed.

Gwen was out in the yard and came running in and said Chuy got hit by a car.....I started to run down the driveway..which seemed to take forever as our driveway is very long...as soon as I saw him laying in the street I started to cry.....I was in my pjs on the side of the road crying and trying to get the cars that were wizzing by to stop..... No one was stopping and another car actually hit him again....I screamed and was bawling at that point......neither of the cars that hit our pup stopped....so so rude.....

Finally a lady in a mini van stopped...I ran out in the street and scooped up his lifeless body.....I started back up the driveway carrying our Chuy and bawling my head off...I went and sat in my pjs in the dirt under the oak tree holding him while chad dug his grave. Thankfully Chad was home.... He just got home from a business trip. Chad said to me much later...I was surprised you picked him up out of the street....I said....I had to..I couldn't leave our dog out there.

As chad dug the grave I sat there holding our dog ....looking down at him and realizing he was never going to do his sweet doggie smile again... And seeing his limp body in my arms. I felt the full impact of death to my core.

At one point while chad was digging he said...honey you can lay him down...I said no I can't....so I held him until it was time for him to go in his grave.....once the grave was dug I carefully laid him in it in a cozy position. I couldn't watch while chad covered him up....thank God he didn't suffer.

Gwen cried a bit when it happend, because she saw it happen....she never loved Chuy...nor did Chad but they are both sad for Chuy..And Gabby.... Gwen seems to be fine.

Graham cried a lot and said to Chad...daddy we are a family with out a
dog.

Gabby was thankfully at the high school at baton/majorette practice.

We had 3 hours to wait to tell her that her baby ....chu chu was gone.
As a parent you dread the day you have to tell your child news that is going to break their heart.....the closer it got to three the sicker I felt.

My in laws arrived and were greeted by Graham ...who blurted it out before they were even up the front steps. It broke my mil's heart...she is a dog lover and liked chuy and felt horrid for gabby.

Chad and I went to pick Gabby up. I got out of the car so I could hug her.... she walked up all happy and talking about how hot and tired she was.... I hatred that I had to devastate her....I told her and she cried hard..I hugged her and cried with her...chad held us both. She asked a few questions in between sobs...she is doing ok .

Not everyone loved Chuy because he he was hyper, jumpy and yappy at times. .....we did...he was our pup and we will miss him a ton.


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Monday, July 25, 2011

Thoughts from my bed....

Tonights topic is.......Big families.
Not talking crazy big like 19 kids and counting big.....but bigger than the average family of 4. Do I consider my family of 6 big...Yes !!

The world is set up for the perfect little family of four....tables at restaurants, hotel rooms...most cars are made for the smaller family...I'm sure there are more examples that I can not think of at this late hour.

That being said the pros of a big family out weigh all the semantics.

I am friends with this great family that has 5 siblings....that are all adults, and they all love to be together so much....recently their grandma died and I watched a couple of their kids so they could go to the viewing.....as the 4 sisters left I felt glad that they had each other...and glad for my kids that they have each other.

My 3 older kids are visiting their cousins in oregon for the week...so I am a parent of one....it has been soooooooo many years since that happened. It is a bit too quiet on one hand and on the other it is pretty amazing...and super easy to only have one child to worry about. I missed the kids after they were gone half of a day....sheesh.

To late ....must sleep...
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Sunday, July 17, 2011

Thoughts from my bed.....

I'm sure you are wondering what does that mean....I thought it would be a fun new segment...where I actually write about some things I want to write about, but never do because I have so many other things to post about.....and I am typing from my bed...which is nice because I am not hunched over the computer...but laying in my cozy bed.


Tonights thoughts are many but I am going to focus on the womens lib movement, and how I feel it has done more harm than good.

I know that statement may cause a lot of controversy...but its how I feel.

I think about this a lot...but tonight it is on my mind because my niece is in the hospital a short two weeks after my sister went back to work.

By creating the womens lib movement....and getting women so prominently in the work force...we have made it near impossible for women to stay home and take care of their children and homes. I know not all women want to do that but so very many do that are not able to.

My sis likes her job and likes working but it would be a whole lot easier if she could stay home with her kids especially since my niece has special needs. If she could afford to stay home with her babies she would.

Chad and I chose way back when gab was born for me to stay home with the kids. Financially it would be huge if I worked outside of the home... But I want to be with my kids (most of the time...ha ha)...they need their mama....even at 14 Gab needs me more than ever....not that she thinks so...but someone needs to guide their choices and decisions at this age ....especially with boys in the picture, and drugs, alcohol, friends , internet safety ..and much more facing todays teens.

I wish we could rewind back to the 1950's....I feel like that was the golden age in america...the ideal time to live.....realistically I know there is no such thing as perfect...and there were issues..but as a whole it was ideal.

I know there are women who love their jobs and want to work and find a way for their partner to stay home...which is great too...but I'm sure as any average one income family will tell you...it is hard.....and it is even harder with four kids in todays economy.....yes I know I didn't have to have four kids...But I wanted to... I have to remind my self of this when I can't go get that cute new pair of shoes I want. Truth be told I might have had more if we could have afforded it...

One other thought on this topic...
Because we as women have made it so that we can do anything a man can do we have taken away some things from our selves..... Things like being treated more delicately....I personally like haveing doors opened for me, and if I have my hands full of kids and groceries having a man offer to help is amazing...we are also expected to keep our emotions in check ....and it has also affected how we dress...I personally like wearing dresses and looking pretty....

Getting bleary eyed....enough for one night.
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